Improving the Parent-child Relationship with Graphology
How we, as humans, bring up a child is sometimes different and sometimes similar with how other species do. The major difference is that we have forgotten to listen to the voice of parenting which comes from within us – it is called Parenting Instinct. It is there in every species, every living being.
What is parenting all about? Parenting is raising a child physically, emotionally, mentally and socially. It is a profession without a manual or any training. We all depend on the advice given to us, until our parenting instincts kick in.
Some thoughts from a curious mind could look like :
• Am I a good parent?
• How can I give the best to my child?
• How to raise a happy child?
• How much independence should be given?
Are we, as parents, constantly struggling to ensure :
• Our child behaves well
• Our child matches the expectations of everybody around us
• Our child gets a healthy meal and eats well
• Our child gets up on time
• Our child does his/her school homework
Think, as a son or daughter, would you like a parent who :
• Is nagging you always for something or the other
• Remains irritated most of the times
• Is dominating or stubborn
• And many such things …
I am sure the answer to all of these is “No!”.
Let us explore 2 traits in Graphology through which nagging and irritation can be identified :
• Letters that reveal the writer is nagging or unnecessarily stretching arguments are :
The common thing in both the formations is the stretched part. The more you stretch the letter, the more you stretch the talk. You become more argumentative!
• Formations that reveal the writer is irritated :
The extra unnecessary things like ticks, hooks, dots becoming dashes, etc. are the signs of irritation.
Let us understand what happens when we as a parent nag or remain irritated :
• The more you nag, the less they hear. The bond between the parent and the child weakens. The child never likes to hear the same thing again and again.
• We can pour from a jar to a glass, the content of the jar. If we remain irritated, we pass on the irritation to our child. If we are filled with love, we pass on the love to our child.
What do we, as parents, need to do?
We have stopped enjoying parenthood! We have become like an obstacle to our own child’s growth. What is the best for a child is the parent itself. We, as parents, need to understand that we too need to change at every stage. Children need a parent who is a mentor, supporter, nurturer, criticizer and last but not least, someone whom the child can depend upon.
Few Do’s :
• Understand that every child is different and requires a different upbringing. Never compare. Comparison creates irritation and in-turn nagging.
• Remain attached to them. Attachment does not mean being possessive. Help them understand that you are there with them. The child should be able to come to you when they need you.
• Identify what are the things that you are struggling with. List them. Do not try to solve all the struggles altogether. Let go of a few and start working on a few. Learn to pick your battles!
• Give them choices. Choices give children a chance to speak. It also teaches decision making.
You can go through our videos on Parenting Tips for more clarification!
Few Don’ts :
• Do not try to be a super parent. We all make mistakes. Recognise your mistakes and don’t repeat them. Don’t forget, we are their role model!
• Do not take any social media parenting groups too seriously. Do not try to make them a high achiever in each and every thing – like Chess, Phonics, Tennis, Guitar, Dance, etc. See the hidden potential in your child, and support that.
• Do not tell them what not do. Instead, tell them what to do! let them make their own decisions.
The most important thing that you need to remember as a parent, is to Love Yourself! When you start to love yourself more, you feel happier, and in turn develop a stronger relationship with your child.
Want more insights one Parenting? Then, do read our blog, Effective Parenting & GRAPHOLOGY